05 août 2009
Nicotine supply
The need to replenish one’s nicotine supply gets recorded in what may be the highest
definition memory the mind can produce. Our mind is essentially told, “Hey, pay attention
to this!”8 Continued nicotine use causes these extremely salient memories to quickly pile
up. They soon begin burying all remaining memory of life without it. We quickly “forget”
that it was ever possible to function without it.
Our rewarded and punished mind was left totally yet falsely convinced that nicotine use
was essential for survival, that it defines who we are, gives us our edge, helps us to cope,
and that life without it would be horrible or even meaningless.
Rewarded by dopamine
and punished by an endless need for more nicotine, we quickly grew to believe that we
cannot function comfortably without it.
Why can’t you starve yourself to death? Have you ever thought about it? Not only are we
rewarded with dopamine “aaah” sensations when we anticipate eating or actually do so, we
are punished with anxieties and hunger pains when we wait too long between feedings.
Yes, what goes up must come down.
As our body slowly metabolized and rid itself of the
nicotine we introduced via our method of delivery, we gradually experienced increasing
mood deterioration and escalating distress, punctuated by insula driven anxiety, depression
and anger. We each endured greater extremes in daily mood swings than non-users, and
the greater our dependency the more unstable our moods
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